Over the Fence

Lamb clicks Restart

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 02:12:25 GMT

A lot of changes going on now. First, I'm starting college in the Fall! This is exciting, but I keep on worrying about the tuition bills. I'm afraid of my education taking more than four years just because of finances. I need to find a job, start a business, or something along the lines or my grades will cease to be my greatest worry. *sigh* Life is life.

I'm still very energetic about it, though! It'll be a great experience and I feel that I'll be a different person in four years (hopefully better!). If someone reads this blog's raaare updates, wish me luck?

In other more relevant news, this journal has a new layout! Livejournal went and broke my S1 customized theme so I had to go and use one of theirs. I might find an override and upload it later on, but this is it for now. I find the little chick adorable!

There is also something else that's awesome! Hopefully, I'll be getting to take a painting class in the fall. Since my art supplies will cost a hell-lot, I'm probably going to sell 1-4 of the finished products (provided that I approve of their quality). I'm not a great artist, but every painting comes with a miniature piece of my soul engraved in it. That's what makes paintings special. <3 I'd keep 'em all, but unfortunately, there isn't enough space in my apartment! More info on this to come later.

Love,
Lamb

Lamb hasn't posted in a loong time

Sun, 04 May 2008 16:04:38 GMT

I wonder what happened.

I can never keep a journal going. At some point, my life gets busy and I become distracted... and then, I just stop writing. This last year I had so many concerns that it was impossible to keep up with a lot of things I love.

I haven't taken any doll photographs, haven't done any significant artwork in the spring term (I did some CG work in the fall and three paintings), have been largely absent from Gaia and DemonTears and Trickster.. really, the whole cybersphere. My IRL life is moving along and I'm generally fine with plenty of friends but sometimes I miss all of that.

It was nice when I wasn't so busy, when I had time to do a lot of things online. In a way, I grew up in the online world... I was such a quiet child. At any given time, I could count my friends on my fingers. That's not me anymore and now I see while people vanish from the online world so often... it's because their real life becomes all-encompassing.

Maybe, though, I won't have to give up my past life completely. Maybe I can make time for it. I'm going to give it a try.

Sheep Answers to Doll Questions!

Tue, 25 Jul 2006 16:00:13 GMT

There was a very long survey in the BJD doll forum I go to, and I decided to answer it. Orginally I didn't even think I'd manage to finish it, but I did! Whooo! It might be a pointless waste of time, but I'm proud of myself. My fingers hurt now. >.<

1. What is your name and birthdate? Mariya, August 13th of year 0000. I feel awkward about giving out my birth-year to unknown eyes.

2. How long have you been interested in dolls? Ever since I was little, and kept on asking my parents to buy me more dolls.

3. How many SD dolls do you have? One.

4. What is/are the name(s) of your doll(s)? Iglen.

5. What type of SD do you have? Dollmore Lilis Liv, SD size.

6. Do you believe in Fate? I do, always have. (is this really a doll question?)

7. Who is the manufacturer of your doll(s)? Dollmore

8. What was your first reaction when you saw your SD for the first time? "She's so pretty, but way too expensive. T___T"

9. Have you shown your doll off at a Doll Show? Nope

10. Which do you prefer? Commercial SDs (such as Kyon customed dolls) or customizing your own SD? Commercial, because I'm afraid of customizing myself. I'd like to try with a practice head at some point though.

11. How do you feel about Commercial SDs? They save the people who want a beautiful doll and can't customize. <3

12. Did you create a personality/background for your doll(s)? I tried, but in the end I decided against it. She has a personality, but I've given up trying to word it and write it out, and her background might be written later. I think it doesn't really matter.

13. What type of relationship do you have with your doll (ex. Beloved daughter, friend)? In a way, she's my conscience. I like to look at her and think when debating a problem, especially when it's right versus personal desires.

14. Does your SD have a nickname? Glen, Glennie. I also gave her 'Reira' as a middle name.

15. What special meaning does your doll's name have? Iglen is a character in my mother's Russian novel. She is an 'alien' of sorts, although not quite in the way most people think of it. She's a rather minor character but I like her.

16. Does your SD have a special seat/place in your room? If so, where? She has her own shelf behind glass, which provides enough space for her.

17. Did you buy a chair specifically for your SD? No, but if I was to see one that looked like it'd fit in a store, I'd buy it. I might make my own at some point.

18. Does your SD have accessories of her own? (ex. pets, toys, hairbrush) Yes, she does. Hairbrush, baskets, flower bouquets... all sorts of things.

19. What hard to find items do you wish you could get for your doll? Not hard to find, hard to afford. Some of the higher-end glass eyes, and some softly she walks outfits. Really nice shoes too.

20. What is the most expensive thing you've bought for your doll? It was probably that beautiful dress from Dollmore with the uber-tiny designs that's in black and red plaid and a goth-loli style.

21. When you go out, do you take your doll with you? Only once or twice.

22. If so, where have you taken your doll? To my neighbor's and for a short walk.

23. Is there a regular place you take your doll out to? Nope.

24. If you do take your doll out of the house, how do you carry her? (ex. SD violin case, backpack,etc) Basket, I'll probably be taking her to a doll meet in a bag this weekend though.

25. When you do take your doll out, is it easy to do or do you find it's more trouble than it's worth? Difficult. I'm always afraid of destroying her somehow.

26. Does your doll have a friend? Do you think your doll wants a friend? Iglen is somewhat vain and selfish. I mean, she might enjoy having someone to talk to, but she won't particularly like sharing or anything.

27. If you could build your dream FCS for free, what would it be? Hmm.. I'm not sure if you can get a Carol via FCS, but I'd like her, or a Kun. If any Volks doll though, I'd want a School C girl to be my "Achi" character. She's a dream for a long time from now.

28. What is your favorite optional head? School C

29. What is your least favorite optional head? Ushiwakimaru (sp?)

30. What type of fantasy head would you like to see produced? Sheep-girl. Hands down, no question.

31. What is your favorite wig for your doll? For Iglen, it's the long blond wavy wig. If I was to ever get Achi, I love this soom wig that has straight cut long layers.

32. What made you choose your SD out of all the various types? She was extremely realistic when it came to her emotions, her sculpt had something deeper than just beauty.

33. Do you change your SD's wig often and have you tried styling the wigs? Never, but I'll be changing for the first time next week. I tried styling, not much good from that. xD

34. How many wigs do you have? One. Soon to be three.

35. How many shoes do you have for your doll? Does your doll have socks too? One. I wish I had more, but alas. No socks, either.

36. What types of clothing does your doll wear? (name in order of favorite styles) Hand-knit fashions and goth-loli.

37. Where do you purchase your SD clothing? Dollmore and Ebay

38. Do you sew clothing for your doll? My mom knits/sews clothing, but sadly, I can't sew myself.

39. Do you plan on dressing your doll as an anime character? If so, who? I don't have any plans for it, but it'd be amusing.

40. Do you make accessories for you doll? What kinds? I might have made some, but I don't remember anymore.

41. Have you made doll items that you plan on selling? Nope.

42. Do you sew/knit/crochet and for how long? I don't.

43. Is there a type of music that you listen to when you are with your dolls? Whatever I listen to normally.

44. Have you ever thought about opening a doll shop? I'd have nothing to sell.

45. Do you have a specific area in your home where you keep your SD? I answered this in an earlier question, on a shelf behind glass in my room.

46. For how long did you know about SDs before you actually got your SD? About a year, when I first saw Volks Heath linked from the DeviantArt gallery of someone who wanted one.

47. Do you carry your doll around in the house? Yep. All the time.

48. Is there a special place in your house that you like to sit with your doll? She sits on my table, or on my laptop, and I watch her.

49. What are the comments you have heard in regards to your doll, after others have seen it in person? Mainly "beautiful" and "O_O-likeness", my grandpa offered '..you payed that much for THIS?', which was a less-appreciated comment.

50. Does your doll have their own website? Nope.

51. What is the color of your doll(s) eyes now? Also give the size of eyes, too. It's some sort of gray-blue glass in 16mm, but it's too dark. I'm buying her some masterpiece blue eyes that should arrive soon, and a brown pair too.

52. What is your favorite eye color for your doll(s) and why? Blue, because it suits her best.

53. How often do you change the eyes? I haven't yet.

54. How many different pairs of eyes do you have for your doll? One, about to grow to three once these packages arrive.

55. Do you believe your doll has a "soul"? Sure, she does. She has a part of my soul.

56. Do you talk to your doll? ...is it too geeky to admit it? Sometimes for fun, sometimes when I'm trying to sort my own thoughts out.

57. When talking to your doll, how does she address you? ...I don't really remember her addressing me, but... I suppose she'd use my name? O_O

58. How do men react to your doll? My dad thinks it's stupid and I'm being childish.

59. What was your favorite childhood doll growing up and why? A very expensive barbie with long brown hair that my day searched for all over and found imported from Germany because I wanted a barbie with a wig. It actually had hair extensions, but it was still very awesome. For the time in Russia, she was probably pricier than my BJD and VERY elusive. My mom yelled at him for a very long time about spending so much on a doll, but he couldn't let me be dissapointed on New Years'. xD I remember I'd fallen asleep and woke up with her standing in front of me. I still have her on a shelf, although her age is obvious.

60. Did you have to sell items from a personal collection to raise money to purchase your doll? Nope.

61. If so, what did you sell? Skip.

62. How much do you spend on your doll a month? What is the maximum you would spend? Normally, nothing. This month though, 66 dollars. The maximum would be around a hundred, but it'd take some thought.

63. Have you purchased something you regretted later? Not yet.

64. Do you like buying clothing sets for your doll? I love it, but I can't afford it.

65. How often do you change your dolls clothing? About once a month.

66. If you could take your doll anywhere with you in the world, where would that be? Well, I'd be worried about having her travel with me... but probably Japan so she could visit where the dolls first originated from. Maybe to South Korea to visit Dollmore, too.

67. Have you ever done something to your SD and felt bad about it? (ex. leaving her naked all night, dropping her) When I first got her, I accidently opened her headcap and spent a half-hour in panic while trying to put it back on.

68. What paint brand do you use on your doll? I don't.

69. If you were stranded on a deserted island with your doll, what 3 things would you want for your doll to have? Wig, eyes, and an outfit.

70. Does your doll have a girlfriend/boyfriend? Nope. She's completely single.

71. Does your doll have siblings (ex. brother/sister)? Nu-uh, although she almost got a sister before I changed my mind.

72. Will you pierce your doll's ears? Jee Mon had them pierced for me when I first got her.

73. Have you given your doll a manicure? What color? I haven't, I might eventually though.

74. Did you do the esthetic process on your doll? No, but I really need to.

75. If so, are you glad you did? Skip

76. If not, why not? I couldn't afford it at the time. T__T

77. If you could change anything they did with the SD body, what would it be? Better posability and make her breasts less perky. I know it sounds weird, but it's true. >.<

78. Have you sueded and wired your doll? Nope, I'd like to get her sueded/wired though.

79. If your SD could be friends with any other SD, which SD would it be? A particular one? Well, she'd like to go and hang out with her Lilis sisters or maybe a very pretty boy.

80. Do you plan to get more SDs in the future? In the distant future, yes.

81. If so, which SDs? A School C to be my Achi, and I almost recently got a Latidoll Cara "Holy Night" before I changed my mind (*cough* had my mind forced to change)

82. Do you change the paint on your SDs often? Nope.

83. What is your SD’s favorite color? Probably white.

84. In general, what is your SDs mood or look? Sad, thoughtful. She makes me think of someone who has lost her purpose and is having a hard time finding it again.

85. Describe your SD's favorite outfit. A white knit dress with red accents down to the knee, white knit armwards, two matching red hats, and a red knit purse.

86. Does your SD have a formal name? What is it? No formal name, really.

87. Do you have any “colored” wigs for you SDs? (green, pink, blue, purple, etc) Which ones? Nope, I don't.

88. What SD would you like to see in the future? I'd like to see more SDs that can really be changed with a proper face-up and that are more than just pretty.

89. If you have more than one SD, do you favor one over the others? I only have one, unfortunately.

90. Is your SD for display only? Umm.. well, I wouldn't call her display only. I mean, I love her and carry her around and 'talk' to her, but... I treat her quite gently.

91. Do you have any brand name clothing for your SDs? Not any of those really expensive brands, I'd like to though.

92. Is there any SDs you regret not buying? I would have really loved to boy a LatiDoll Cara "Holy Night" and I'm not sure if I was right about not buying her. The School C with the perfect Achi make-up haunts my heart but I simply couldn't have afforded her.

93. Do any of your friends own SDs? Only online friends, quite a few of them.

94. Do you have SD get togethers? I want to go to one this weekend, if that counts.

95. Have you lied about the true cost of your SD to your family or friends? I may have tilted it down a bit a few times.

96. Do you think of yourself as being obsessive about your SD? If so, explain? Not obsessive, I don't really take my hobby to any extreme levels. I buy her bare necessities and only things I feel she needs, like more photogenic eyes and a bit more clothes for variety. I'd like to buy her another pair of shoes, but there's nothing obsessive about it She really doesn't have a lot of things.

97. If the house was on fire, what would you grab first? Your SD, wallet, clothes or no time and save yourself? My wallet and save myself. I'd grab Iglen if I could, but I really would be more concerned about saving my own life.

98. Did you buy a digital camera only because you wanted to take pictures of your SD to show off online? Nah, I couldn't think of what I wanted for my birthday and my dad convinced me I needed a camera a few years back despite me telling him that I wouldn't use it. He ended up using it much more than I did, but once Iglen came, I finally had a reason to use my camera myself.

99. If you passed on, who gets your SD? wife/husband/kids/best friend/no one...it goes with me! Explain why! My mom, I suppose. She supported me in getting her, and she's based on a character from her book. I'd prefer to live a long life though.

100. Do you think you'll ever tire of your SD? Why/Why not? I hope not, but anything is possible.

Sheepishly Quizzed

Thu, 06 Jul 2006 18:31:28 GMT

Today, sheepy buried her brain far far away and took a bunch of fun quizzes, so here's what I got:

Your Scholastic Strength Is Evaluating

You are great at looking at many details and putting them all together.
You are talented at detecting subtle trends, accuracy, and managing change.

You should major in:

Statistics
Speech
Conflict studies
Communication
Finance
Medicine

What Should You Major In?

You Should Be A Poet

You craft words well, in creative and unexpected ways.
And you have a great talent for evoking beautiful imagery...
Or describing the most intense heartbreak ever.
You're already naturally a poet, even if you've never written a poem.

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

You Are 20 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Your Inner Blood Type is Type B

You follow your own rules in life, even if you change the rules every day.
Sure, you tend to be off the wall and unpredictable, but that's what makes you lovable.
And even though you're a wild child, you have the tools to be a great success.
You are able to concentrate intently - and make the impossible possible.

You are most compatible with: B and AB

Famous Type B's: Leonardo Di Caprio and

What's Your Inner Blood Type?

You Are Not Scary

Everyone loves you. Isn't that sweet?

How Scary Are You?

Mocha Frappuccino

Hyper and driven, you'll take your caffeine any way you can get it. Frappuccinos are good, but you'd probably chew coffee beans in a crunch!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

Your Life Path Number is 4

Your purpose in life is to build your vision.

You are practical and responsible. You work hard, knowing that there are no shortcuts in life.
You work for a better life for yourself and those you love, but you are not an idealist.
Trustworthy and honest, you also demonstrate great courage. People can count on you.

In love, you are a loyal and committed partner. You are the ideal spouse.

You don't give up easily, and sometimes you can be too stubborn and unwilling to change.
You also can be too conservative at times. You sometime miss out on good opportunities.
Also remember that not everyone can work as hard as you, as disappointing as that is!

What Is Your Life Path Number?

You Have A Type B+ Personality

You're a pro at going with the flow
You love to kick back and take in everything life has to offer
A total joy to be around, people crave your stability.

While you're totally laid back, you can have bouts of hyperactivity.
Get into a project you love, and you won't stop until it's done
You're passionate - just selective about your passions

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

Your Fashion Style is Classic

You like what's stood the test of time...
Simple, well styled clothes that don't scream trendy
You stay updated and modern, but your clothes stay in style for a while
You wouldn't be caught in animal prints, fake fur, or super bright colors

What's Your Fashion Style?

Well... that was more than enough. ^__^

Dance, Sheepy!

Sun, 02 Jul 2006 16:16:43 GMT

On Friday, I went to a Pussycat Dolls concert. Honestly, I'm not a big fan, and I know only a few songs. However, it was a free concert (sponsored by CBS news who invited them, taping it for the Early Show on July 5th) and I got on the VIP list so I grabbed Daisy (a friend) and we went. It was in Midtown, on 5th Avenue and 59th street. Apparently, they hold concerts every Friday that are free to attend and have big-names (Pink is performing next week!). I have the e-mail so I can get on VIP and the front rows anytime, too. ^__^ I'll probably go to some more concerts if I'm bored this summer and someone I like is performing.

Anyhow, I have a pretty neutral review for the Pussycat Dolls. Firstly, six is a strange number. Normally, bands have odd numbers of members and it makes them look more organized on stage. Secondly, they don't really have a set 'look', they're all so different to the effect of being clashing (*cough* Miss Red *cough*). Their music is pretty good though, and I recognized a couple of songs I remember hearing on the radio so I was pretty excited about it. The vocals could be stronger, but they're good and most bands in the industry aren't exactly amazing. It was a great way to spend time, but... lets just say I wasn't getting their autographs or anything (although, I could have probably sold them on ebay xD).

The rest of the day was a whole lot of fun. Daisy and I went to FAO Schwartz and hugged every giant stuffed animal there. We got all around the store (which of was pretty huge), and even talked to this salesperson guy who showed us the Harry Potter character wands. There was a blunt black one that was the 'mystery' wand, and apparently, belonged to Professor Snape. Unfortunately, no Lucius or Draco Malfoy. :( Apparently, they haven't come in yet. I remember you can also order wands online, so.. if I get a really biting urge, I might do that. They also had the Corpse Bride dolls, those lovely 100-dollar jointed figures. The pullips were really adorable in real life, and I had a sudden urge to buy one. There were these cute black and white ones with bunnies. So cute. Oh, and one of the employees was also playing the on-floor piano which was amazing. Probably a better concert than the Pussycat Dolls, I have to sadly admit. xD (Please don't kill me for that one)

Lunch was good, at a place right across from the store that had yummy food. We then headed to Build-a-Bear because I'd never actually visited it. Bear boxers. Nothing funnier. xD They're 'Beary Hot'. Since it was around Rockefeller Center, we also went to this big Japanese bookstore which had a life-supply of manga (both English and Japanese) and a great variety of Japanese books about everything (sadly, I can't read Japanese so :( for me). There was also the Death Note Artbook which was -awesome- and I wish I'd had enough money to buy it... but I didn't take enough. T___T Oh well! We also passed by this store that had plenty of antique-things including some very cute vases and such. It was great to look at, but the owner kept on looking with a face that said 'You better not break anything' so it was a tad uncomfortable. I had a great time and couldn't walk all day Saturday because of all the muscles I pulled. I want to make further voyages into Midtown!

Signing off,
Artsy Sheep

Wed, 31 May 2006 20:34:42 GMT

仏説摩訶般若波羅蜜多心経観自在菩薩　行深般若波羅蜜多時　照見五蘊皆空　度一切苦厄　舎利子色不異空　空不異色　色即是空　空是色　受想行識　亦復如是　舎利子是諸法空相　不生不滅　不垢不浄　不増不減　是故空中　無色無受想行識無眼耳鼻舌身意　無色声香味法　無眼界乃至無意識界　無無明亦無無明尽乃至無老死　亦無老死尽　無苦集滅道　無智亦無得　以無所得故菩提薩依般若波羅蜜多故心無礙無礙故　無有恐怖遠離一切顛倒夢想究竟涅槃　三世諸仏　依般若波羅蜜多故　得阿耨多羅三藐三菩提　故知般若波羅蜜多是大神咒　是無上咒　是無等等咒　能除一切苦　真実不虚　故説般若波羅蜜多咒即説咒曰　羯諦羯諦　波羅羯諦　波羅僧羯諦　菩提娑婆訶　般若心経

I don't know if you guys are Miyavi fans, but I am... and was lucky enough to find the Heart Sutra on one of the forums I visit (DoA, Lynsey posted it), which some of you might know.. is his back tattoo. The rest of his tattoos aren't -that- difficult to find but I wanted to share this one. <3

-Arsty Sheep, signing out.

The Immigration Protests

Fri, 21 Apr 2006 23:35:33 GMT

Since I post rather rarely, I come to you bearing yet another tale, courtesy of my life in New York City.

A couple of weeks ago, I was in the city, and it was about 3 or 4 in the afternoon, I believe it was Monday the 10th. Now normally, I would head to Broadway and take the express bus there, but imagine my surprise when I come about two blocks short, and there are people with flags and booklets, chanting things! I didn't quite recognize what was going on, and perhaps I would have missed it entirely, but I had to head toward Broadway. Now, I went another block... but everything past that was completely blocked off by the police. I could hear loudspeakers past that now, and the streets were crowded with crowds of people trying to walk across the police detours.

I have to say, I'm not a particularly perceptive girl, because even though I realized -something- must be going on, I didn't quite understand what it was. Either way, I took the route around (and walked another 4 blocks as a result), and got unto broadway where I saw hundreds and hundreds of people, mostly mexicans, standing in front of a platform with a speaker and a large screen. They were making speeches about legalizing illegal immigration (yes, I know the way I say it makes it sound oxymoronic). I understood what it all was at once, then. In fact, I heard every word twice, because I'd taken Spanish for quite a few years and every sentence was repeated in both English and Spanish. They shouted phrases like "We are Americans" and "We deserve equal rights!". I have to say, it was quite the event. Now, honestly, at that point... I wasn't as interested in the potentially-historic role of these protests as I was on getting home.

I headed down Broadway, but came upon a police blockade that would only allow people who worked or lived on the following street. After standing behind the blockade for 15 minutes or so in an effort to explain that I needed to get to my bus (which, I later found out, wasn't running due to the protests), I was forced to turn back. An interesting thing happened while I was attempting to get through, a woman had taken out her passport as identification for the police officer (only she later discovered her home address wasn't written on it and thus it wasn't much good), and although it was a US passport, I caught a glimpse that she was from the 'Dominican Republic'. I wondered for some time after, what did she think about these protests? How did she feel?

Of course, I never got an answer, nor had I expected one. On my way to the train, I did pay more attention to all the protests and speeches. While pushing through a crowd I can only descibe as gigantic, I saw tons and tons of Mexicans holding American flags. It almost seemed strange, to some extent, when they were speaking in Spanish between each other yet coming to this protest and waving the flag. I do not hold an opinion on whether their presence in the US should be legalized or not... but it allowed me to take a view upon their stance beyond the newspapers. It was an interesting experience, and you can make from it what you will, but I wanted to share it.

-Artsy Sheep, signing out.

Boom goes the Sheep

Mon, 13 Feb 2006 23:22:55 GMT

I fell twice. In four days. Weird? You bet.

On Friday, I was rushing from my computer to the TV in the other room to see the Olympic opening ceremony. I slipped and fell flat on my front. Ouch. My injuries were: My upper arm, my knee, and my jaw. They're still hurting quite a bit but it's gotten better.

Today after swimming, my shoes must have been wet and thus I came crashing on the staircase. Oddly enough, two of my friends didn't even -look back-. Rude? Hell yeah. I'm going to hope they simply didn't notice I fell, despite the very loud sound. ^_^; My other friend did notice though and asked me if I was alright and such, and luckily, I was and had no more injuries to add to the list. <3

Conclusion? Be more careful to avoid falls and know which friends will be useless if anything bad ever happens to you.

On a more loyal friend note, one of my friends promised to send me some manga I wanted to read. I can't wait! The shoujo to compliment all the shounen-ai I read. xD

Signing off,
Artsy Sheep

The Sheep and the Land of Finals

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 22:46:11 GMT

It's nice not to have classes for a week.

...it's not so nice though, to have exams that week. History, Two different Mathematics, Chemistry, and Drafting. In short - ugh. I've been reading textbook after textbook. Today's reading book: A Math Book I covered a few years ago (and yet being re-tested on (!) ), and a Chemistry Textbook for tommorow. Anyhow, I doubt anyone is too concerned about these things. *rips out the rest of the paragraph she wrote baout exams*

On my site (www.demontears.com), I've been doing Guard duty for the first time in months. For readers who have never been to DT, when a roleplayer enters, they meet the guards at the 'Outskirts' to enter the gates of the city. It is their first RP, and our way of having an RP test of sorts. However, it -is- rare that we'll turn a user away. It's been refreshing to do Guard Duty but I have to say, I still dislike it. When I first opened the site, I did so much of it that I now have a permanent distaste for it. I'd left moderators to do it for a long while, but... with one moderator moving, another one on IRL related hiatus, and one slacking off (must kick him), I've had to do it on my own. Thing should return to normal by Friday though, and I'm glad.

I was reading my friend's list of posts today, when I spotted a post by Cap'n that wasn't related to WoW. I was surprised, and sad too, once I found out she was having emotional trouble again. I haven't spoken to her in quite a long time though (she doesn't go on AIM much), thus I can't even do anything to comfort her. Don't you wish sometimes, that you could just do -something- for your friends, be some help, yet your hands are tied behind your back? It's like that.

Despite my very rare posts, I tend to visit this place 1-5 times a day. I'm part of some communities (that I keep out of my friend lists for easy browsing) that I read daily. However, it is only on a blue moon that I really feel like I want to write in this journal. I wonder if those habits would change if more people commented on my entries. *pokes readers* Anyone out there? :)

I suppose I should go now, I have things to do and my ramblings have gotten rather long. I hope everyone is doing well.

Signing out,
Artsy Sheep

Strike, Strike, Strike!

Tue, 20 Dec 2005 21:26:07 GMT

New York lay pleasently aslumber, but in the city dwelled something dreadful. Not a whisper on the streets, but in a shining hotel, words were passed that would decide a city's fate. In a conference room, men in suits debated. One, a leader of the transit workers union, with an accent so thick he could barely be understood. The other, a leader of the Metro transit authority,in a carefully pressed suits but the bags showing underneath his eyes as it neared midnight. Men sat at all sides, arguing a mere piece of paper.

The clock struck midnight. The rugged man turned his back and left the room, heading with a group to inform the others that nothing was to be gotten through debate and conversation. A short drive, and he was amongst his own, the transit union. A ballot was passed, and a decision was made. A strike. If they wouldn't get their demands through speech, they would receive their demands by force.

3 am. The people of New York still lay sleeping, but a decision had been made for them. They'd struggle that morning, that day, and perhaps longer due to a simple whisper let out of a room. An announcement was made, and suddenly, the buses became empty. The subways unattended. Within mere minutes, the transit strike was on and transportation was down. However, the people of New York didn't yet know this. They slumbered peacefully without a second thought, after all, they had expected the strike last week... and it hadn't happened. There had been mumbles, threatening words, but nothing to suggest that today might be the day every bus in the city to freeze. No secret signal that those underground trains would stand frozen. None.

The city dwellers awakened that morning, and were frozen in realization as they stared at their television screens in surprise. There hadn't been a transit strike since 1980, how, how, could they do this now? Were strikes not illegal? However, they were soon overtaken by thoughts regarding how they'd get to work, get their children to school, who would they carpool with to achieve the 4-people in a car city entrance minimum... panic rushed through a city. That morning, thousands... perhaps millions of people walked across bridges in freezing 22 degree temperatures. They car-pooled, found alternate methods to reach work, and many simply stayed home. While many students attended schools near their homes, others stayed home chuckling, wondering how a mere two-hour delay would ever help them defeat a multi-hour commute. After all, the bridges stood still, and cars just barely crawled across them, the traffic being so severe.

Soon, it was 4 o'clock. Panic caught people once more. They had reached work that morning, but how would they ever return? A few hours walking once more? Perhaps a few miles hike to that ferry? With some luck, it would take less than an hour to come this time...

...what happened? We'll see. After all, this story isn't a fictional novel but merely my life today. I had no way to reach school, seeing as it is within the city... and it would take me many hours to walk. My fear, though, is that this strike will last more than one day. What, then? While missing class one day is alright, staying home and watching the news, starting my vacation a week early isn't quite as sweet as it sounds. I'm intending to carpool tommorow, I've found a person who might drive.

As I write this, on the television, I hear the story of how the Red Cross is handing out coffee at the center of the bridge, and how some santas are selling heating belts (?). I also hear a woman shrieking about how frozen she is. Let us hope for the best, us being myself and whoever might actually read this.

-Artsy Sheep

The Sheep, The Turkey, and The Breath of Air

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 02:29:40 GMT

Free. That's how I felt over Thanksgiving. The moment the last bell of Wednesday struck, I knew there were no more tests for a while and four days to regain my sanity. I used them well, and without waste. I slept well that night, and managed to clean the piles of god-knows-what in my room that I've been too busy to clear out. I helped prepare Thanksgiving dinner too, and got to enjoy it with relatives I don't see quite enough of. I was ecstatic. Friday, I did nothing, a new concept for me. Saturday, a bit of homework and dinner at my Aunt's and Uncle's. Sunday, the rest of that homework and a relaxing evening with a movie.

Shortly: I loved it.

On Monday, I could barely get into the routine of regular life, and I didn't truly want to. I felt sleepy by the end of that day, possibly due to the change in sleeping time. However, the rest truly did help me and I managed to get my drafting project done. Truncated Rectangular Prism - Complete! The 3D model, too! :)

Today, I had the time to go to my 'Manga-ka' club, and did some drawing. The theme is Christmas; and I have three weeks to complete the artwork. Color is allowed. I have this idea, and if anyone reads this, I'd like to share it:

The first panel, this woman is speaking, panel shows her. Non-bubble speech. "Every Christmas, I dreamed the angels of Christmas would grant my wish..."

The second panel, which takes up the majority of the page shows a Christmas tree with a male angel lying under it, wrapped in Christmas ribbons. "However, I never thought it would be quite like THIS."

Yes, yes, cue the shoujo warning. Now, I intend to continue the story if so wanted... but I'd rather leave it at that, seeing as the task is to make a single page. I think I'll do some anatomy studies for the male in the coming days.

Here's hoping that all is well,
The Sheep

Work Sheep, Work!

Sun, 20 Nov 2005 16:48:35 GMT

I feel like someonne is holding a whip over me and cracking it each time I grow distracted, but instead of reforming my habits, I continue to distract myself and almost ask for the whip to be cracked again. Does that even make sense? I think not.

I've been overworked lately. Test after test that results in unpleasing grades, a large amount of homework and the occasional project. I know of course, that this is mostly related to the ending of the Marking Period; right before Thanksgiving. Afterwards, it'll be easier. However, I'm twitching and my stomach turns as I think of that report card. Since I was a small child, I've always dreaded doing worse on a report card than I did on the previous one. This was probably why, for many years, I had a habit of doing horribly the first marking period so whatever I got on the second would be an improvement. However, this year... I did wonderfully, causing me the chaotic stress and tears. This month, I burst into tears over a 79. While, it' not exactly the best grade, it's... frightning that I has such a strong negative response over a grade that's not 'so bad'. However, it was followed shortly by an even worse Chemistry Test, as I'd been forced to take the test on the same day a term project was due for History... a project that sucked up my time. I'm a mess, really. I didn't do well on the re-take, even. Ugh.

I need no fortune-telling to tell me that I won't be happy with that cursed piece of paper that grades my achievements and shortcomings. I don't want to see the damn page, and I wish they wouldn't make me. I want to draw, I want to enjoy my life... I hate the feeling that my life will be ruined by a single letter on the page.

I shouldn't write about it. I feel that whip, cracking once again, reminding me this is a DISTRACTION, reminding me I have to finish my homework and get working on this latest project due Wednesday. Reminding me I have a Chemistry Test on Tuesday, and Wednesday is stolen by Spanish. Not to mention there is Drafting Practical, that I forgot the date of... oh please, save me, someone. >.<

However, you can't. No one can besides myself... and I'm failing... oh so terribly. I'm sorry for my rant. Good-bye.

The Sheep Rambles

Thu, 20 Oct 2005 01:59:07 GMT

This week is flowing in a smooth and relaxed manner. It's rather nice, although I am receiving my weekly stress regardless. Today, I considered going to the "Chocolate Club" meeting afterschool, but I decided against it as the concept involved waiting 45 minutes idily until it started. Tommorow and Friday though, is the Club-Pub fair where all display their various and sometimes insane clubs. I intend to go, although I'm unlikely to join more than another club.

In class, most subjects are fine, although I constantly worry about my tendency to panic during exams. Even things I am completely sure of and know well, I tend to lose in a fit of panic. This is especially evident in subjects like Spanish where I often find myself struggling to form a sentence although in a relaxed situation, I can ramble easily in the language, whether written or spoken. It seems that ever so often, my worst enemy is by no means my lack of knowledge but my the panic that devours me during exams... and one can't study to eliminate -that-.

Math, is simply complicated, but thusly, managable as it's a matter of learning concepts. My lack of ability to develop my -own- concepts and derive formulas with creative methods though, I doubt I can do anything about. Perhaps if I study more thoroughly, it'll grow easier. Drafting, which tortures me to bits with measurements is unfortunately enough the closest thing I have to art this term, and I'm rather glad I have at least one such subject. Spanish can be described as horrific, which is the topic of the previous paragraph. Chemistry comes near-naturally to me in understanding, and surprises me as I have never had much care for the subject before. I enjoy it, as I do English. An easy teacher this time, and I opted for the Classical rather than European Literature, seeing as I prefer various mythology as opposed to tales of the Revolutionary Ideals. History, remains a class I'm fond of, but unfortunately, the teacher... is not to be envied. She enjoys seeing students struggle as she generates assignments much too long for given time and commands us to do most of what she teachers for homework. History, itself though, I adore. I enjoy seeing it play out, as if each person is a figurine, moving across a chessboard. Perhaps, I'm just odd? Still, it's pleasent.

Outside school, I have had quite little time, relying on social interaction being friends I see during my multiple free periods. I need to do my weekly artwork for an online art exchange I'm part of, and I have a vague concept for it that needs to appear on paper. My own site, DemonTears, I've briefly been visiting to be sure that all is functioning and to answer private messages. I will need to contact some of my moderators and ask them for some updates on current events. Furthermore, I am amidst the installing of a new section to the site, a link list of sorts, functioning as a list of various submitted roleplay sites with link and descriptions that cycle with each refreshing. Instead of sorting sites by popularity, I wish to provide every link with an equal opportunity to be viewed.

I suppose, my rambling has gone overboard now, and I've lost the one reader I have, so I best go.

-Artsy Sheep

The Sky is Broken, I Think

Thu, 13 Oct 2005 14:45:01 GMT

Certainly, it does seem like someone is beating the sky till it frees all the rain it has held hostage this summer. The past summer had been full of scorching heat and plenty of opportunity to eat ice cream and enjoy the beach. It had rained perhaps once during the entire time. I loved every single moment of it, as not only was I free from classes, but I could spend my days outside.

However, the weather seems to have found a time for revenge. In the summer, I remember having to water the trees and wilting flowers every other day to keep them vibrant. Now, autumn has come in a rather large way. Gallons are pouring from the sky for a few days now. The street outside resembles a river and the idea of leaving the house is downright frightning as it will doubtessly result in a very damp sheep with fingers frozen from the wind.

I want to indulge in photography, but the weather forbids it. The lighting is downright terrible, and I refuse to use artificial lighting of any sort due to not only lack of it, but the fact that the results could never compare to the lighting of a bright day. Instead, I'm studying woefully long lists of vocabulary and see the impending doom of homework glaring at me despite today being my day off. After all, it's Yom Kippur, no school... a holy day to many, including my father. Yet it seems, no god is smiling upon as as the rain pours.

Am I perhaps a tad too dramatic? Over-reacting about a few days of unpleasent weather? Perhaps.

-Artsy Sheep, signing off.

First Musings of the Sheep

Thu, 13 Oct 2005 01:47:23 GMT

I must say, this isn't my first account.

In fact, four years ago, I had another, with a name that I can only imagine I must have been drunk on something (perhaps cough syrup?) to have created. Naturally, I might think the same about this particular name, but I rather hope I still find it clever and witty in a while.Best I forget about that for the moment though, and focus on how to introduce myself to you.

I have a few options. I could be one of those silly people that rants on-and-on about one of their many specific hobbies, or I could be one of the people who rambles about nothing. Better yet, I can waste your time by telling you to read my bio. However, I decide.. that informing you that none of the above -truly- matter unless I prove myself to be an active member is the best course of action.

After all, what do you care who a person is if they make but one post?

-Artsy Sheep, signing off.